


amnesty.

by oh_la_fraise



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Gen, Spoilers for s06e05 The Crows Premiere
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-05
Updated: 2020-02-05
Packaged: 2021-02-18 22:20:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22567441
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oh_la_fraise/pseuds/oh_la_fraise
Summary: What’s that saying about setting something you love free?Spoilers for Crows Premiere.
Relationships: Patrick Brewer & David Rose
Comments: 26
Kudos: 72





	amnesty.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi. So what if we took an episode of a 22 minute comedy and put the darkest spin possible on it?
> 
> In all seriousness, I believe Patrick when he says he doesn't want kids, but this is a what if where two people who love each other very much run up against an insurmountable hurdle.

“You’re sure you don’t want kids?” David asks, watching the gaggle of Patrick’s cousins run around, screaming and sticky. The _event_ after the dentist has been fresh in his mind--Patrick’s brief hesitation playing on repeat. 

“You don’t want kids,” Patrick says. It’s not an answer. 

++++++++++++++++

Days go by.

++++++++++++++++

They have to do marriage counseling as a requirement to get their marriage license. It goes smoothly; they’ve talked ad nauseum about financial plans, when to retire, what to do if David suffers a brain injury and becomes a dedicated Yankees fan. But when the therapist asks about kids, and Patrick pauses ever so slightly before saying “it’s not in the cards for us,” David knows this is the beginning of the end. It’s written all over Patrick’s face.

++++++++++++++++

What’s that saying about setting something you love free? 

++++++++++++++++

Patrick is the numbers guy, but David is good with puzzles. He’s able to figure out this one pretty quickly. Patrick had tried so long to make things work with Rachel, who was perfect for him on paper, that when things clicked with David, he was so relieved to finally understand love he didn’t stop to think if _David_ was right for him, long-term. David knows that, unlike his past relationships, this implosion is nobody’s fault, just a cocktail of puppy love and great affection that masked _irreconcilable differences,_ as lawyers on TV always said.

It’s nobody’s fault, and that makes it all the worse. 

++++++++++++++++

He doesn’t remember anything from the day that was supposed to be their wedding. Small favors.

++++++++++++++++

Days go by.

++++++++++++++++

A guy named Andrew starts coming into the store. He’s Ronnie’s cousin-- _of course_ he is; Ronnie must love that--and he’s. Handsome. Tall, in a gangly way, with a smile that’s a mile wide. He likes the microbrew they sell-- _I’m not sophisticated enough for wine,_ he says, in a charming enough way that David doesn’t want to immediately punch him--and he’s always asking Patrick about it, even though he surely knows more about the product than Patrick at this point. He props his elbows on the counter, his long body stretched across the store, and he always asks Patrick, never David. 

One evening, David catches them kissing in the bathroom, and it feels like the ground has fallen out from beneath him. Patrick looks about the same. Even now, they still know how to hurt each other.

++++++++++++++++

If they come back, they're yours.

++++++++++++++++

David stalks Patrick online after he sells his shares and moves away. He fucks Jake, watches Patrick’s Facebook go from _In a Relationship_ to _Engaged_ to _Married._ There’s a girl who hangs out at the Wobbly Elm, dark roots peaking out of her bad blonde dye job, and David crashes at her place for a while. She has good weed and is a decent lay, and David tries to pretend that’s all he needs.

++++++++++++++++

Days go by.

++++++++++++++++

_Welcome to the family, Lizzie!_ Patrick’s Facebook says. There’s a little girl smashed between him and Andrew, chubby cheeks smiling angelically. She has a riot of curly hair, and David wonders if anyone in that poor girl’s life will know how to take care of it. Patrick will learn, David’s sure; he can imagine Patrick hunched over a computer, studying the Curly Girl method like it’s the Bar Exam. 

He closes the tab. He’s got to open the store, arrange some vendor pickups. This is the only child he wanted, he reminds himself. 

++++++++++++++++

If they don’t, they never were. 


End file.
